My Journey Into Healing

Two weeks ago I was in San Diego at Deepak Chopra’s Center for a “Journey into Healing” 4 day program that changed my world. As you all know I’m on a journey to heal my Psoriasis and this program was a dream come true for me. I want to share what I experienced in hopes it will help you in some small way. This was my first trip by myself, so I was a bit nervous not knowing what to expect.  At this retreat we woke at the crack of dawn to meditate while the sun rose and our view was nothing but beautiful mountains. After meditation we did yoga outside as well. I always try to meditate on my own, but this was very different. It was scheduled, with a group of people and there was nowhere to go and nothing to distract or interrupt myself with.  I had not been this alone with myself in a very long time, possibly ever. Majority of the 4 days my phone was off.   Ok ok…maybe the occasional text:)   After that wonderful start to the morning began the lectures by amazing doctors and healing teachers such as Deepak Chopra himself, Dr. Mark Hyman, my personal favorite and the whole reason I was even there, Kris Carr and countless others who were just brilliant!

I felt a bit ill from the start of the first day and I blamed it on my late flight the night before. But, I noticed the heavy feeling of fatigue stayed with me and so did a bit of a cold and sore throat. Each day felt different, each hour too… Some moments I felt great and others just downright not well. Overall I felt like crap. It wasn’t until I started talking to people there that I discovered a lot of them weren’t feeling well either and that’s when I realized I was detoxing. Detoxing everything from toxicity in the air I breathe in good old NYC to the non-stop voice in my head. This was fascinating to me and I found myself not wanting to return home. I wanted to return to my family, friends and most of all fiancé, but I wanted them to come to me and I wanted never to leave that beautiful place with the fresh air and like-minded people.

Let’s talk about the like-minded people because they were a big part of the trip. First let me just say how wonderful it is to hang around people who are on their own healing journey too. There is something about this lifestyle we deeply get. It’s so much more than good nutrition! I felt myself being inspired left & right, every time I spoke to someone new and learned why they were there. There were a lot of doctors who wanted to change their practice to a more alternative one, a lot of cancer sufferers & survivors, and a lot of people like me who had a specific illness or disease and wanted to learn more to help themselves & others. There was a woman I met who was there to receive credits to one day be able to teach herself. Meditation literally saved this woman from a severely abusive life with her husband in Iran. One day she was about to take her own life when a friend interfered and took her to an underground meditation group to try to help her. In Iran meditation is illegal!  Meditation helped her start a new life which brought her to her calling to help battered women.  This is the very short version of her journey, the long version had me close to tears and my mouth literally gaped open! Inspiring huh? That conversation sent chills throughout my body.

The food was delicious and so healthy. It was plant based, anti-inflammatory foods with lots of fresh healing herbs. In those 4 days I learned a ton about science, the Ayurveda approach to health, healing through food & herbs, how addictive sugar really is, how to love & honor myself, how to embrace my own spiritual practice, how to deal with my emotions, how to be more conscious every day and most of all how I want to live my life in the most loving & present way. It’s been 2 weeks and I’m still digesting it all. You should see my notes!

A big shift took place for me when Kris Carr spoke. The way she tells her story is so moving and funny! It’s not a funny story, but she is quite the comedian!  Something specific she pointed out hit me like a brick to the head and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.  In case you don’t know Kris Carr, she is a cancer thriver (she calls herself) of the stage 4 terminal kind. She’s healed herself through plant based nutrition & self-care with things like spending time in nature, embracing a spiritual practice & moving herself to a more stress free environment. She’s simply amazing and has proven all the doctors wrong. 13 years ago she had something like 28 tumors on her liver! Today they are shrunken & dormant or gone, due to her new healthy lifestyle. She has written multiple best sellers and talks all over the country. You may have also seen her on Oprah!  Anyhoo – back to my brick in the head. She said in the beginning of her healing journey she was doing EVERYTHING she could to heal herself. She learned how to make macrobiotic food, hired a chef and everything, tried every herb, every supplement, went to every kind of doctor, you name it, she did it! I related to this because I do everything for my Ps. EVERYTHING! I see the chiropractor regularly, go for colonics seasonally, see a nutritional response testing practitioner regularly, take whole food supplements, eat a mostly plant based diet, exercise regularly, use coconut & neem oil and all sorts of essential oils. I just wanted to give you an idea of my daily regiment because I SO believe in healing the natural way. I know I can because I’ve already done it once!

I bet you’re all dying to know what Kris said! Ok, sorry…she said she tried everything and nothing was really making a big difference, she wasn’t seeing the healing take place fast enough. (This is how I’ve been feeling the 2nd time around and it’s a bit frustrating!). Then she had this huge epiphany walking through the woods one day – she realized that everything she’d been doing all that time for her cancer was exactly that – for her cancer – not for herself – not for Kris. It wasn’t until she had that realization & started doing it all for herself that she started to see real healing take place. Her tumors started to shrink. It was a huge moment for her and hearing that was a huge moment for me as well. Everything I’ve done these last 3 years was all for my Ps – not for me – not for Kim. I’m still processing that. I do know that THAT has to change if I want to heal for good which I am so ready for. I want to heal 100% again and then embrace my calling to help others.  I still feel a bit wow’d when I think about it and I hope that thought helPs you in some way, big or small. For me it was big, but I think that’s because all these years I thought I WAS doing it all for me, but I wasn’t. Maybe I’ll start referring to myself as a Psoriasis Thriver! I like that, very positive!

I hope you enjoyed hearing about the retreat. Feel free to message me if you would like to know more about it.

Love,  Kim, Psoriasis Thriver:)

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